Tag Archives: laid off

Have you been RAPED at work? Given the SHAFT?

Dear Employees,

Due to the current financial situation caused by a slowdown in the economy, Management has decided to implement a scheme to put workers of 40 years of age and older on early retirement. This scheme will be known as RAPE (Retire Aged People Early). thedonald_yourefired1

Employees selected to be RAPED can apply to Management to be eligible for the SHAFT scheme (Special Help After Forced Termination). Employees who have been RAPED and SHAFTED will be reviewed under the SCREW program (Scheme Covering Retired Early Workers).

An employee may be RAPED once, SHAFTED twice and SCREWED as many times as Management deems appropriate. Employees who have been RAPED can only get AIDS (Additional Income for Dependents & Spouse) or HERPES (Half Earnings for Retired Personnel Early Severance). For obvious reasons, employess who have AIDS or HERPES will not be SHAFTED or SCREWED any further by Management.

Employees who have not been RAPED and are staying on will receive as much SHIT (Special High Intensity Training) as possible. Management has always prided itself on the amount of SHIT it gives employees. Should you feel that you do not receive enough SHIT, please bring it to the attention of your Supervisor. They have been specially trained to give you all the SHIT you can handle.


The Management

What are you doing to get by?

What I mean is, have you recently been laid off and have become so depressed that all you can think about is booze or drugs or some other vice or form of self-mutilation? I pray that you have not resorted to some unsavory behavior. I have found that sleep is my drug of choice. I had no idea how exhausted I was until I was confronted with being laid off and not having an office to go to at 8:30 in the morning. The fact that I set my own hours, which usually means I’m working from 10:45pm to 5am sometimes, allows me the option of sleeping in. That is, after I take my son Elijah to school.

Today may be an exception. Here it is 11:11pm and I am dead tired, trying so hard to keep my eyes open. What’s going on? I still have at least 6 hours left to work, right? Not tonight! I cannot do it. Lupus has made the decision for me. It has looked me straight in the eye and proclaimed “Lenette! You  must go to bed right now!!” Funny, right? Yeah, I know. I am going to sleep…. I have a ton of pics to edit, but I am so sleepy……

Until next time… peace be with you…


Laid off but not laid out…..

img_06603toon1I’m still alive! No duh!! I have never been laid off in my life… until now. I have read so many stories in the last year of people taking their own lives after suffering financial set-backs. As morbid as I am, let me make one thing perfectly clear: BEING LAID OFF IS NOT THE END OF THE WORLD AND NOT A GOOD ENOUGH REASON TO TAKE ONE’S LIFE!! In fact, it may be the beginning of a more fullfilling life for some.

I have been putting off my career ambitions and for lack of a better term, I’ve just been lazy. Going to an office day in and day out, doing work that didn’t really satisfy me, all because I was afraid to quit my job and take a chance on myself. My biggest fear in life is FAILURE! That word deserved to be capitalized because that is how much it scares me. It’s like a serial killer waiting around the corner for me. I am not a great writer but I am a talented artist with a vision. Photography and graphic arts are my passion and trump everything that I have EVER done in an office setting!!

And so, the economy has forced me to look fear in the face and hopefully, defy it! I actually thought of jumping back in and getting another unfullfilling job just to be employed. Not a great idea, so I scratched that for now. I will miss some of the many perks that come with working for an Agency, but I think that once I get my feet totally submerged in the unknown world of business-ownership, I will be fine! I am prayerful that all will be well! 

And besides, how would it look for me to quit? After all of the trials and tribulations that my ancestors went through. My Polish grandmother was forced to eat rotten food or starve, slept in fear of the Nazis as rats crawled all over her and her siblings, was spat upon while being called “Polish Swine” and having the blood of her father splattered on her dress, all before she got here to America. And let’s not forget about my African ancestors who endured repeated beatings, loss of religion and native tongue, children snatched from their mothers, men snatched from their wives, and all eventually sold on a chopping block for mere dollars after arrival in this strange new land! ! My Polish and African ancestors were treated more like animals than human beings!!  I will not let them down by sitting around feeling sorry for myself! I will do what I love to do and make them proud!!

One genre that I love is pinup photography. I will upload some of my images in a future post…. until then, peace be with  you!